I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize