Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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