i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
