PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
