I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Randomize
