ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I'm eating all of the evidence.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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