I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
