yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
