David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Randomize
