What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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