You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize