How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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