Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
and she was petting her beer can
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize