You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I take back everything I said about communal showers
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
