so explain again why im purple
no
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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