p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
