Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize
