I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
