I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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