Are we in a gay sports bar?
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like having sex with a tree stump
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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