A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Randomize
