i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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