i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
