just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Randomize
