Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
