I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
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