it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
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