You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
