what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
How's work?
Spinning.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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