I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
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Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
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do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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