Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
