I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
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