I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Dignity is for republicans.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
