gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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