ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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