My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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