i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
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dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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