I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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