Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(561): View more from Florida

I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.

Fav 4 1463 1678
share tweet
(601): View more from Mississippi

I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.

Fav 42 5300 1186
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(919): View more from North Carolina

I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.

Fav 7 3385 1252
share tweet
(201): View more from New Jersey

i have to get rid of the hedgehog.

(765): View more from Indiana

Does it come with a cage?

(201): View more from New Jersey

yes. and food and toys.

(765): View more from Indiana

i'll trade you an 8th for it

(201): View more from New Jersey

deal.

Fav 26 10269 1560
share tweet
These 23 Kids Have The Most Overbearing Parents Imaginable
Read it at the TFLN blog
(207): View more from Maine

So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.

Fav 32 8171 2850
share tweet
(513): View more from Ohio

We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.

Fav 17 4127 1141
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(859): View more from Kentucky

Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby

Fav 13 4673 1830
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(270): View more from Kentucky

My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.

Fav 0 835 426
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(718): View more from New York

Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.

Fav 1 57 88
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT