me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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