The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
These People Had Regrettable One Night Stands
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
This Girl Makes Latte Art That’s Too Cute to Drink
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.