she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
