so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
your room smells of hookers.
And success
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Randomize
