i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Acid is not a monday night drug
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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