white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Randomize
