He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
