Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
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you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
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omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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