R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
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