i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize