Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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