Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
