Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
