I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
